His life was a breeze
Just one thing left to appease
Wanna give that bottle a squeeze
and look just like Charlize?
But these times are so hard
Must do more than lay in the yard
To look like a Belize postcard or a reality star
But this story s tragic
You don t turn orange by magic
You could do it solar like Rick or stick your ass in a thick tank full of darque waves cuz it s the latest craze
Do it for forty days, get accused of wearing blackface-oh!

DARQUE TAN, HE S A FAN!
DARQUE TAN, NO MORE WAN!!
DARQUE TAN, IT'S HIS PLAN!!!
DARQUE TAN, CHILDREN RAN!!!!

I knew it was a bad idea when he got into that bed
I never knew it would come to this til he looked at me and said
I wanna get a tan! Uh-uh!!
I wanna get a tan!! Bad idea!!!
I wanna get a tan!!! I don t think so!!!!
I wanna get a tan!!!! TOO SCARY!!!!

And now he s dead, I ll never see him again
He turned orange, then red
No one wins in the end
Then he died, his face was fried
In the booth all that s left is a tooth
He turned red, then he turned dead
Listen and learn... or you, too, will be burned.